PNS351 Liza, two Chers and a Boniva shake

Show notes by Queen Elizabeth II -- Good evening. I am enjoying some down time by playing bingo. For those times when you can’t wait for a hangover, drink Penguin wine. One sip changes everything! And, yes – it does mess with your bloods. Rob’s working on a torch song for his next cabaret show that will mess with your mind. Happy birthday, Judy Garland! Ladies and gentlemen: Liza Minnelli. And Cher, dishing out the Premorin and the Boniva. So many memories. Well, what’s left of them. Gaw, did you see Lorna Luft’s gold lamé gunt in Grease 2?You can email Cher at wrought-iron-crosses848@aol.com, but she’s only gonna read it if someone can help her press the buttons. She’s busy in her sensory depravation tank. You have to see “The Incredible Shrinking Woman”! Lily Tomlin flips bacon and yells at Concepcion in the garbage disposal. It wasn’t Austin Scarlett taking a dump at Sidetracks. It was another Austin. Aren’t you relieved? He was. A listener calls to say the words, “Mel Gibson.” Sugar tits! Noah says he doesn’t care but still comes up with an opinion. Hurrah! Penguin Wine will get those dingleberries off your ass in seconds. Pat shares his ass-wiping secrets. Another caller accidentally played the show with the VAG wiping stick and that lovely “Don’t Stop Queefing” song in front of a patient. Awkward! What was your most awkward moment? Martha Stewart is awkward, makes her guests feel awkward and still her audience loves it. Or they’re too scared to admit they don’t. Summer’s here and that means one thing: boyfriends. I’d like Christopher Meloni to be my boyfriend. Some great 80s movies: “Just One of the Guys,” “Last American Virgin” and “My Tutor.” Netflix ‘em, kids. Cher gets a little cranky because she needs a Premorin shake and a different wig. A lovely song about pissing your pants to finish up. Call the comment line 206-888-GAYZ real soon, won’t you? Legs eleven!
PNS351

PNS325 Hopin' to find, we're two of a kind.

PNS 325 show notes by her Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II --
Good evening. One is pleased to note that Rob has returned to put the R back into PNSexplosion. Oh, that didn’t work. Moving on. The show opens with a lovely rendition of the “Silver Spoons” theme someone sent in. Who? I guess we’ll never know. [ed. note-- this was by Kentie from theflatusshow.com Thanks Kentie!!] Instead, Cher’s Kitty Litter View Oscar Extravaganza is hosted by her, Cher, and her son daughter Chazzy. Liza thinks she’s back at Studio 54, dancing the night away with Margaret Trudeau, who used to go there to deal with her bipolar depression. Another bonkers French-Canadian, Celine Dion, drops by the poop pit. Her fart will go on. Andy-not-Andrew Melton is too famous to pick up. The phone, that is. On the Food Network they’re making a cake for Miley Cyrus. I hope someone smacks it into Billy Ray’s face as payback for “Achy Breaky Heart”. The Oscars are coming up. Helen Mirren won Best Actress in 2007 for playing me, the queen, in “The Queen”. Her tits weren’t quite as magnificent as mine but otherwise, not bad. I made her a Dame for her troubles. Isn’t a blart a blood fart? America’s Podcast Curmudgeon, Chris Gieger, takes a day off to enjoy the asexual Morrissey’s new album and watch the sexless “High School Musical 3”. From "Something Is Squeezing My Skull" to “We're All in This Together” – talk about an emotional roller-coaster. Whoa! Denise Rish-ards, who was voted Worst Bond Girl of All Time for playing a nuclear physicist in a tank top and hot pants, just celebrated her 38th birthday. Rob’s back from playing a drunk in a play where a cute tot called Hedvig drops dead. Good times, Henrik Ibsen. Seriously, Pat will keep asking you to sponsor his greasy diarrhea blasts until you do it, so cough up $5 through PayPal and get a shout out on the rilly big shew. You know they’re funnier with a coupla wines in ’em. The Stalker-Rapist-Serial Killer drops by to threaten everyone. Winky icon! The first time I masturbated was at the investiture of Prince Constantine Alexios of Greece. Yes! Yes! Yes! Speed dial 206 888 GAYZ to Aks the Gaywads or send the Fax of Life. Drizzle your comments over pnsexplosion.com. Serve immediately. Liz out

PNS325

PNS319 I <3 Peeing In a Hot Tub, OMG!11!

PNS319