PNS362

PNS362

PNS341 Your Cup Runneth Ovary Part Troi

PNS341 show notes by a dripping wet BBW -- It’s your third show in three days, you lucky sonsabitches. Go ahead, stuff ’em in. Can I offer you a T-shirt cannon full of chocolate pudding? Ka-boom! Right in your pie hole. Kristin Chenoweth is plucky, irritating and all her cartoon voices sound exactly the same, while Robin Quivers’ quivering pussy sounds exactly like The Flight of the Bumblebee. “17 Again” made Pat’s pussy quiver. Zac Ephron dances during a basketball game – again. Man, that kid is kinda typecast. Meanwhile, Noah is practicing his two-count cooter slam-dunks for his big dance debut next week. Where the hell are Cher’s residual’s for TaB Clear? Gee, Your Downstairs Hair Smells Terrific™. Did Michael Douglas fuck Jeanne Tripplehorn in the A? How could you tell? There’s a black drag queen in Augusta, Georgia, called Fantasta. Fantastic! Susan Boyle is Dumpsy McDumpers with a good voice. Just wait until teh gayz get hold of her. End of story. Speaking of unnecessary transformations, there’s a special place in hell for the producers of “The Swan.” The contestants all come out with horse veneers, big tits and huge hair. Even the women. Dor’thea is right outside Noah’s new place, while Dor’thea’s friend is kinda pushy. The 300 shows DVDs are being sent out as fast as Old Bessie can pump them out. How to audition for your guest spot in the PNS stujoe: buy Rob drinks. This week’s Irrelevant Pop Culture Moments™ star Ed Westwick, Spencer Pratt, Lauren Conrad, Chelsea Handler, Ashton Kutcher on Twitter, Ashton Kutcher on Demi Moore, Martha Stewart, Roselyn “Russell” Sanchez, Ellen DeGeneres and Hayden Pantietear. It’s all totally irrelevant. Now that Rob’s a stay-at-home mom, he slips on his kaftan and flip-flops, opens a box o’ wine and watches Oprah. This week: cock-cutter Lorena Bobbit, skater-hater Tonya Harding, who’s now proper and has Prednisone face, and a bunch of baby-drowners. So much for Live Your Best Life. There are lots of us BBWs on Xtube, who are either getting slammed by hot guys or just sitting around eating junk. Now, they’re my kinda gals! Somebody please buy Noah a subscriptions to Plumpers Magazine. He would love it. A listener calls for advice about his relationship, because when I think about the subtle aspects of love and romance, I think PNS, don't you? Retardo-Cher takes the question. And the Don Juan of the Midwest, Pat. There’s valuable advice for you. Besides Scherzinger, the Ussy Cat Dolls are Slutzies, Stinkzies, Whorzies and Grumpy. Send your summer jams suggestions to pnsexplosion@gmail.com. Tax-i!
PNS341

PNS322 Nooner

PNS 332 show notes by This Random Woman --

Heeeeey!!! Watchya’ll doin’? I be gettin my drank on. You want summa dis? No? OK, be like that. These PNSexplosion peoples stopped me while I was running down the street with my gallon jug of wine to make a real important announcement. Here it is:

“PNSexplosion: The First 300 Episodes” is ready. Finally. Here’s how to get it:

1. Go to PayPal.com
2. Dump $50 into the PNS account: pnsexplosion@gmail.com
3. Make sure you include your mailing address!

You’ll get a DVD – signed, goddammit! – with 300 shit sammies and vidcasts. Yo ears is gonna be bleedin’!

Haven’t got a fiddy? Get yo friends together. Give 1,000 nickel beejers. Find a way. Or email Patrick and start bargaining.

I don’t know what the hell this show’s about. Everyone’s called Natasha, or somefin. They be reeeeeeeeeeal gay. Listen to it yoself. I see ya later, honey, okaaaay? Wooooooo!

PNS332

PNS331 Mandouche vs Ladydouche.

PNS331 show notes by Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II -- A gay man in a musical? Whatever next? While Rob’s on assignment, Marc and Emily are back for round two. Here’s how to use “sharmoot” in a sentence: “Ikhlassy akhrasi ya sharmoot wa iftahy khashmik.”* Time to get down to business: lady business. Emily fields more questions about gyne, like what the hell is going on down there and how does it work? They smell like Depends, taste like Chicken In A Biskit and you can use them for off-street parking. Handy! Patrick says he once fingered a gyne in his Dodge Omni, although he was probably looking for loose change in the seats and got carried away. The tables turn when Emily and Marc ask about man-douching. Water in, precious stones out. No vinegar, no basil. What-what? 10 quick questions for Emily from virgins, 13-year-olds and clueless boys. I think we all learned something. Urethra Franklin might want a little respect, but not in that demented hat. Who sent in “The Book of Bunny Suicides”? Own up! Ashley Simpson has shruggy shoulders and the Joffrey Dancers have supertight boxes. A lovely new tune to infect your brain: “Suddenly I Queefed.” Vanity plates to consider: DIK SKR, FNGR BLST or 2PNK 1STNK. Call 206-888-GAYZ with your burning questions. Liz out.

PNS331

*Translation: “Shut up man-bitch and open your mouth.”

PNS326

PNS 326 show notes by her Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II --
Good evening. Buffy did it. The Simpsons do it all the time. Heck, even Xena: Warrior Princess did it – twice. It’s the all-singing episode, a cavalcade of shrillcasting that makes you laugh, cry and poop yourself a little bit. It all starts with a gift from listener Kenneth of Hawaii, which used to be called the Sandwich Islands when I owned them. He sent a karaoke CD and the boys just can’t resist their natural urge to work the word “dildo” into every tune. Watch out, Stephen Sondheim! Special guests include Cher, another Cher, the Weather Girls, and Celine. Celebrate your gyne, come on! The Stalker-Rapist-Serial Killer breaks in and the boys are totally up for some casual rape but the Stalker-Rapist-Serial Killer has limits, it seems. A man broke into my bedroom in 1982. He was kinda hot and I was ready to get it on but he just wanted to chat, damn it. Watching fat people fall over is always amusing. It’s why I let the Duchess of York hang around – she’s always tripping over the corgis. Splat! Listeners want to know which Dynasty diva or horse-hung porn star everyone prefers. Alexis Carrington Colby with a strap-on, obviously. With A Hint of Skids®. I have to go. We’ve got 300 people coming to the palace for a state dinner for His Imperial Majesty the Emperor Akihito of Japan, and I need to get this dildo out of my A first. Liz out.

PNS326

PNS295 Brisket Rotel Dip

PNS294

PNS265 Dr. Anal Fever

Annie medley. Great to use for your next enhanced interogation. xox

PNS264

PNS235 Muffdive Mafia

PNS235

PNS234 Oh Crap, I sheefed.

PNS234